SOL25 #0718
Grasshopper
Yesterday, I paused when I spied a tiny grasshopper sitting so still on the handle of my garden hoe that I was turning over for safety reasons.
He was beautiful.
He was so translucent in the morning sunlight.
So delicate.
I dared not touch him.
I spoke to him, “Hop away, Little Grasshopper. Enjoy your day!” And then I heeded my own words and found joy in my day.
I wonder, What gave you joy in the past 24 hours?
Writing about my writing: Word Choice
Writers choose their words carefully. When drafting, they capture thoughts, ideas. When revising, they think deeply about the image and idea and carefully consider their choice of words.
In my first draft, I used the word “transparent” in the line “He was so translucent in the morning sunlight.” When I re-read my draft — which is an important part of revision, I paused and questioned my use of the word “transparent.”
Was the grasshopper transparent?
I went to an online dictionary and read, transparent: “allowing light to pass through so that objects behind can be distinctly seen.” Well, I didn’t distinctly see through the grasshopper. What was that other word that described sunlight passing through an object?
It was on the tip of my tongue, but I couldn’t quite get it. So, I searched again, “word light shining through.”
AI gave me the answer: “The word “translucent” describes a material that allows light to pass through but diffuses it, making it difficult to see objects clearly on the other side.”
Now, which word best describes my grasshopper? Transparent? Translucent? I did another search, “transparent vs translucent.”
On my screen I read, “The (object) is transparent– we can see light shining through it and what’s on the other side of it. The (object) is translucent–we can see light shining through it, but we can’t see clearly what’s on the other side of it.”
I had noticed a reference to a Japanese word when I was searching for “word light shining through”: “komorebi … refers to sunlight filtering through trees and creating a beautiful interplay of light and shadow.” What a beautiful description!
Intrigued, I searched “komorebi pronunciation” and found “ko mo reh bee.”
What a musical word. So fitting for sunlight passing through trees. I need to capture komorebi in my vocabulary notebook.
Returning to my draft, it was an easy choice. I replaced “transparent” with “translucent.”
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I like the way you model this thinking in words so that we can follow your process. I also liked learning the new Japanese word.
Thank you Alice, first for the blurb that got me here. The poem and your detailed process for revising -word choice. As I read your train of thought, it shared what writers go through to select appropriate words.
I did a bit of searching while writing this comment, I thought to use the word trail instead of train and went searching the online dictionary and eventually found the phrase ‘train of thought’.
Yes! “A train of thought.” When I was a kid on state highways (not interstate freeways) we often had to stop and wait for a freight train to pass. My brothers and I would count the cars …100, 101, 102… and more. When I was very young, I marveled that the engine could pull over a hundred cars, one hooked to another, removed from the engine yet hooked to it, rumbling along the track. So, when I hear “train of thought” I visualize thoughts like train cars, each hooked to the one before them, one upon the other, somehow linked to the original thought, rumbling through my thinking and sometimes finding their way through my pen to paper. I think the seeds of a post might be found here.
I love how you take us through your process of finding the right word. You are so right that writers take time finding the correct word because one word can change the whole meaning of a piece.